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Matthew Vaughn

Yuppy in Car

Tim Maurice-Jones

Drowning Man

Jason Flemyng

Tom

Dexter Fletcher

Soap

Nick Moran

Eddy

Jason Statham

Bacon

Steven Mackintosh

Winston

Vinnie Jones

Big Chris

Sting

JD

Nicholas Rowe

J

Nick Marcq

Charles

Charles Forbes

Willie

Lenny McLean

Barry the Baptist

Peter McNicholl

Little Chris

P.H. Moriarty

'Hatchet' Harry Lonsdale

Frank Harper

Dog

Huggy Leaver

Paul

Tony McMahon

John

Stephen Marcus

Nick the Greek

Vas Blackwood

Rory Breaker

Alan Ford

Alan / Narrator

Jake Abraham

Dean

Victor McGuire

Gary

Andrew Tiernan

Man in Pub

Rob Brydon

Traffic Warden

Jimmy Flint

Don

Ronnie Fox

Mickey

Danny John-Jules

Barfly Jack

David Reid

Samoan Jo

Richard Vanstone

Frazer

Vera Day

Tanya

Elwin 'Chopper' David

Nathan

Mark Mooney

Serg

Suzy Ratner

Gloria

Steve Collins

Boxing Gym Bouncer

Sydney Golder

Phil

Steve Sweeney

Plank

Derek Howard

Policeman

Stephen Callender-Ferrier

Lenny

Alex Hall

Slick

John Houchin

Doorman

Bal Jusar

Gordon

Graham Stevens

Policeman

James Tarbuck

John O'Driscoll